15 Gifts for Him
Here are 15 gifts for him that you can’t do wrong on:
1.Apple Watch Series 4 + GPS 44mm. Troy and I just got these for each other for Christmas this year and they came in last week! WHY did we wait so long? We are obsessed! We use the new walkie talkie feature all the time and love that we don’t always have to have our phone on us now! He uses the fitness and sleep apps and I love using the timer when I am nursing. I can also add groceries and share the list and answer emails super fast from my watch!
2.DJI Mavic. Apparently (according to Troy) this is the coolest drone out there right now because you can collapse it for an easy fit into any bag you are carrying! The one he has already is just too big and bulky and adds on too much stress to bring it on vacations.
3.Kershaw pocket knife. My dad gave this to Troy for Christmas a few years back and he says it is his favorite knife. Plus, the $16 price tag doesn’t hurt!
4.Under Armour Joggers. Troy’s favorite pair of joggers that he now has in 3 colors! He likes that the material is thick but not fleece. He works out in them and wears them around the house to lounge. Have you seen your man in joggers yet? Swoon! I guess it would be a great gift for your brother too!
5. Patagonia Fleece Pullover. You can never go wrong with gifting Patagonia anything! This fleece pullover is under $60 and comes in a few different colors.
6. Patagonia Puffer. Troy has this puffer in this exact color (comes in like 8 colors if you don’t like this one!) I wasn’t too fond of the color at first but it has really grown on me because it is so different! This jacket is perfect if he lives in a warmer climate.
7.Chelsea Boots. Does he need a new pair of boots that will go with everything? These are on sale and I love the white sole. Troy has some boots with white soles and they look so good on!
8. Bose Noise Masking Sleepbuds. These are perfect for the traveler! They are made entirely to help you sleep! They even come with a few white noise sounds!
9.Mizzen + Main Dress Shirt. Troy ONLY wears this brand period. I can’t even count how many of these he has. They are made with performance fabric so the guys don’t sweat through them like regular shirts. They can also be machine washed and they don’t wrinkle so they are GREAT for travel! You can also try the flannel Troy is wearing in the photos below or a henley (Troy owns and is obsessed with THIS ONE!)
10. Dop Kit. This rugged looking dop kit is only $17! I feel like guys always wear theirs out and need a replacement! Etsy also has some great leather dop kits that you can monogram… but you better order those asap to have them in time!
11. Money Clip Wallet. Troy has a wallet just like this and I always something is going to fall out but nope, never does. He claims he will only use money clips from now on! Men are weird! If your brother/dad/boyfriend/hubby is the same way, grab this really nice leather wallet! You can also have it monogrammed for $10.
12. Nike Tennis Shoes. Is your husband constantly walking into Nike to see what new tennis shoes they have? Troy does that every time we are at the mall, but never buys anything for himself! He has been eyeing these and they are under $100!
13. Duffle Bag. This duffle is great if he likes to travel or does a lot of night/weekend trips! He will love the scuba material and Dagne Dover is an amazing brand! You can get him THIS slightly smaller duffle if you think he will just use one for the gym.
14. Temperature Regulating Coffee Mug. This one is for the coffee lover! How cool is this Ember mug? It regulates the temperature of the coffee so he will never have to drink cold coffee again! Yes please!
15.The Bucket List Book. Confession: I just bought this and it comes in on Saturday haha! Troy and I are so excited! It has 100 trips (small and large) that you should add to your bucket list! I can’t wait to see if we have done any of them already and which ones we want to add to our lists asap!
Things We Weren’t Prepared For When We Became Parents:
Troy and I had no idea what we were in for when we became parents. We had always heard ‘it changes everything’, and we thought we knew what that meant. Boy were we wrong. It changes everything in your life, sure, but the amount of change in your relationship is drastic.
We lived in an alternate universe thinking that a baby wouldn’t affect us. I think Troy worried about it but I always brushed it off. I thought nothing could change what we had going. I am definitely back in reality now.
-The sleep depravation is the worst. It makes you cranky and moody and you will find yourselves snapping at each other, and at the baby. The one thing you need when you have a newborn is patience and getting little to no sleep does not help with your patience skills.
There is also a lot of resentment that grows with the whole sleep thing. HE WILL ALWAYS get more sleep than you if you are nursing. I don’t understand how he sleeps through it all. I want to throw something. We have tried to find ways to allow me to get at least 4-5 hours at one time and it is still really hard. I wake up in the middle of it and have to pump anyway. And then he sleeps in until 9am and gets his full 7 hour stretch. It is SO HARD.
There is no reason to be mad though. He can’t help it. It is YOU that the baby needs all night, not him.
-Personal space… what’s that? Sure, the dr tells you no sex for 6 weeks (and thank GOD!) I couldn’t even imagine… Buttt what they don’t tell you is that you won’t really want to be touched by your spouse period. When Troy hugs me and holds me there for too long I start mentally and physically freaking out. Or when he hangs on me or grabs at me.. ugh. WHY?
My sister explains it like this: You are at your baby’s beck and call. You have to feed her on demand and be there whenever she needs you. You aren’t really in control of your own body. So, when your spouse acts like he needs you too it is just too much. You just need your own space. It could also have a lot to do with hormones!
-You lose your identity. Stay with me here.. When you have a newborn your life revolves around that baby. So, everything you did pre baby is basically gone. You are either too tired or you just don’t have time to do the things that used to make you happy. Sure, this is time sensitive. Once the baby gets older you can get some of your old self back. But for now that person is gone. You are a new person: a mom. Troy and I used to do a lot of things together as a couple that made us grow stronger. We are unable to do those things now. We have lost our identities and the identity of our relationship. We are working at finding our way back to those people!
-Alone time together is gone. For now. Troy and I get 40 minutes of alone time a day and have to make a point to get that. That is ONE of our favorite shows on Netflix and then it is time for bed for me because I have a sleepless night ahead. During the day we are constantly feeding the baby, washing the baby stuff, cleaning the house, working outside, working on our businesses, etc. There is NO TIME to spend together. We can’t even really go to dinner together or to the store together right now unless someone is watching Miller at home. It is flu season and the dr is pretty skeptical about taking the baby out when it isn’t necessary! We don’t want to risk anything over a meal anyway.
-Free Time. You have ZERO free time. When you do sit down for a second you feel guilty because there is so much to be done. In the morning you will feel so optimistic and list out all of the things you are going to get done. By the end of the day you are exhausted and you can’t seem to remember ANYTHING you actually got done. Everything you said you were going to do that morning still needs to be done! Tonight I was feeding Miller on the couch and Troy sat down and was talking to me and he was like crap, why am I just sitting here. I had to tell him he worked all day and deserved a break! This ties into the time together. When you have 0 free time you have 0 time to spend with each other… even to sit and chat while you are nursing.
Don’t get me wrong. Troy and I haven’t lost any of our love for each other. In fact, seeing him as a father has made me love him even more. She is such a daddy’s girl already. She follows his every move (makes me a little jealous) and the way they play together makes my heart want to burst!
She is everything to us and we are obsessed with her. She is 100% worth anything Troy and I are going through, but I just wanted to warn you guys so that you can also be prepared. You can talk to your husbands about these things ahead of time and get a game plan going. What will your sleep schedule look like? How can he help you get more? Talk to him about your personal space. Find a way to keep doing something that makes you YOU at least once a day (is that going for a run, meeting a friend for lunch, going to work?) And lastly build a plan on how you can make time for each other from the very start. Hire a nanny before the baby comes. Build in a network of people you can trust to watch the baby so that you guys can get away (even if it means a 30 min Target run!)
Maybe I am alone here? Are these just things Troy and I are going through and no one else?
Let me know in a comment below!
Photos by Adria Lea